idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
