We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
