Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Randomize
