Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
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No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
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Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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