oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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