maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont even know how to be here
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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