So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Someone shit on the floor
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.