Sry I called you an 8
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize