She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
