we made out on top of his cat.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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