there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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