there was a trapeze. enough said
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
