Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
