He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
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