OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
