similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
they're like a gay fantastic four
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Randomize
