I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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