Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
