everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize