Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Randomize
