thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
