I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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