Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
