don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
