Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
