Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
