he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize