Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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