There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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