I think im going to throw up on grandma
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
