I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
everyone is single if you try hard enough
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
