Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize
