Texts From Last Night

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  (213): View more from California

  The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.

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  (213): The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was. http://tfl.nu/j53u
  Replies (3) Good night (1425) Bad night (668)
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  (469): View more from Texas

  Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.

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  (469): Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option. http://tfl.nu/owbc
  Replies (10) Good night (2756) Bad night (739)
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  (310): View more from California

  Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."

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  (310): Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz." http://tfl.nu/9mw5
  Replies (6) Good night (3555) Bad night (932)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.

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  (847): She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses. http://tfl.nu/wrem
  Replies (50) Good night (1278) Bad night (4666)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.

  (571): View more from Virginia

  define virginity.

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  (651): Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying. (571): define virginity. http://tfl.nu/5by8
  Replies (17) Good night (5762) Bad night (1554)
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  (415): View more from California

  the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication

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  (415): the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication http://tfl.nu/40rd
  Replies (16) Good night (9183) Bad night (1136)
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  (559): View more from California

  You realize it's finals week?

  (408): View more from California

  Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.

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  (559): You realize it's finals week? (408): Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first. http://tfl.nu/rjos
  Replies (19) Good night (6352) Bad night (933)
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"

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  (269): Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision" http://tfl.nu/cg26
  Replies (3) Good night (2242) Bad night (921)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.

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  (206): I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve. http://tfl.nu/axt4
  Replies (1) Good night (2183) Bad night (752)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?

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  (330): not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up? http://tfl.nu/smja
  Replies (6) Good night (1138) Bad night (2989)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?

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  (503): Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me? http://tfl.nu/fx2p
  Replies (3) Good night (1083) Bad night (547)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog

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  (775): I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog http://tfl.nu/px0v
  Replies (2) Good night (602) Bad night (464)
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.

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  (312): If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes. http://tfl.nu/vx4i
  Replies (4) Good night (1110) Bad night (373)
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  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry

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  (262): And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry http://tfl.nu/q1qo
  Replies (9) Good night (1040) Bad night (346)
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.

  (616): View more from Michigan

  So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.

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  (616): Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did. (616): So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that. http://tfl.nu/as93
  Replies (0) Good night (395) Bad night (528)

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