Texts From Last Night

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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.

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  (508): i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker. http://tfl.nu/03y7
  Replies (5) Good night (778) Bad night (867)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I think that's fair trade off

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  (910): He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj (910): I think that's fair trade off http://tfl.nu/hrzk
  Replies (50) Good night (3835) Bad night (665)
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  (858): View more from California

  i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see

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  (858): i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see http://tfl.nu/4pqk
  Replies (25) Good night (694) Bad night (2591)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet

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  (403): you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet http://tfl.nu/6v3o
  Replies (54) Good night (1546) Bad night (4421)
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  (972): View more from Texas

  she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.

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  (972): she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick. http://tfl.nu/7fj1
  Replies (16) Good night (5657) Bad night (682)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college

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  (303): I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college http://tfl.nu/ihdi
  Replies (35) Good night (5114) Bad night (745)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.

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  (724): i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here. http://tfl.nu/fq3k
  Replies (5) Good night (1227) Bad night (3553)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.

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  (918): I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics. http://tfl.nu/dut8
  Replies (15) Good night (1382) Bad night (2810)
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!

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  (423): You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!! http://tfl.nu/8r5y
  Replies (14) Good night (1492) Bad night (548)
• Favorite

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.

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  (306): No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit. http://tfl.nu/ncdk
  Replies (5) Good night (1303) Bad night (644)
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"

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  (250): His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer" http://tfl.nu/we03
  Replies (5) Good night (1292) Bad night (593)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?

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  (+44): So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff? http://tfl.nu/24fo
  Replies (2) Good night (434) Bad night (731)
• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.

  (1-601): View more from Mississippi

  Oh my god.

  (1-601): View more from Mississippi

  The ballsiest level.

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  (601): So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore. (1-601): Oh my god. (1-601): The ballsiest level. http://tfl.nu/5u5w
  Replies (1) Good night (790) Bad night (539)
• Favorite

  (870): View more from Arkansas

  I have poison ivy on my dick

  (1-870): View more from Arkansas

  WHAT

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  (870): I have poison ivy on my dick (1-870): WHAT http://tfl.nu/5c6b
  Replies (8) Good night (358) Bad night (846)
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.

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  (504): I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now. http://tfl.nu/1all
  Replies (1) Good night (264) Bad night (369)

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