Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
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The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
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just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.