i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
