I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
