Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon http://tfl.nu/qfy4
  Replies (21) Good night (726) Bad night (1633)
• Favorite

  (661): View more from California

  I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (661): I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry." http://tfl.nu/yxdf
  Replies (18) Good night (1100) Bad night (4071)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol http://tfl.nu/nbdg
  Replies (28) Good night (6068) Bad night (687)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend? http://tfl.nu/36no
  Replies (28) Good night (3649) Bad night (1808)
• Favorite

  (828): View more from North Carolina

  you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (828): you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie http://tfl.nu/vbyw
  Replies (36) Good night (6216) Bad night (1546)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it

  (1-617): View more from Massachusetts

  only you. it could only happen to you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it (1-617): only you. it could only happen to you. http://tfl.nu/wr6i
  Replies (32) Good night (1232) Bad night (4653)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before.. http://tfl.nu/lsu6
  Replies (5) Good night (1176) Bad night (2090)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches. http://tfl.nu/ldak
  Replies (13) Good night (1387) Bad night (2496)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax. http://tfl.nu/p0im
  Replies (10) Good night (2505) Bad night (1118)
• Favorite

  (225): View more from Louisiana

  all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (225): all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices. http://tfl.nu/vgow
  Replies (31) Good night (7582) Bad night (1368)
• Favorite

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (901): Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going? http://tfl.nu/ugit
  Replies (16) Good night (644) Bad night (2341)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (414): I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina http://tfl.nu/a948
  Replies (8) Good night (574) Bad night (1070)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces http://tfl.nu/ks18
  Replies (6) Good night (1148) Bad night (544)
• Favorite

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (501): Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys. http://tfl.nu/a792
  Replies (3) Good night (1220) Bad night (454)
• Favorite

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (780): I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is http://tfl.nu/n0jt
  Replies (6) Good night (377) Bad night (790)

Randomize