dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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