omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
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