Are we in a gay sports bar?
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Randomize
