New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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