Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize