If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
it's like heaven, but drunker
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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