what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
