In the future we'll all be gay
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
im having a threesome with these popsicles
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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