Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
kristin has been a bad kristin
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
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