i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
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