I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
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