it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I touched a dick in church today
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
