So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
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