If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
